I bet so many people have been waiting for this so. But this one is a bit nastier!
It has some adult material (Not graphical, just some adult references). So this is just a warning عشان محد يقول ما قلت
Anyway, here we go:
Held against you!
No, I’m not talking about Britney Spears song. Its a scenario that really happened and I was inspired by a drunk guy who got held by an officer.
Friend (A girl): Yes, as a punishment
Me: Well, at least its not something to be held against you legally and for future references… Unless they’re boobs… I definitely want them to be held against me legally and for future references
You expire in December?
*Passing by a security gate at work*
Security guard: Can I see your ID please?
*Pull out my card*
Security guard: Your name is #### #### #### #### and you expire in December 2016?
*Taking my credit card back and pulling out my ID*
I cannot express how weird the pokerfaces we pulled. What made it worse is that the guy knows me.
I’m coiny and I know it
Dragos: I got coins in my pocket
Me interrupting: And I’m not afraid to show them! Show them! Show them! I’m coiny and I know it!!
If April fool. Does that mean teenage mutant ninja turtles smart?
Me: Did you see my last shots?
Friend: Oh yeah I saw your links in titter
Me: You know that titter sounds like a tits making machine, right? That, or plastic surgeon
Friend: I kinda saw that coming…
Hey, in my defense, ….
Never mind, I can be a perv sometimes…
اشوفك صاير غبي!
Khalid is an Egyptian (صعيدي) guy who’s, well, we consider him as a part of our family. So it goes like this:
Dad: خالد تعال تغدا معاي
Khalid: معلش يابو عبدالله اصلي متفطر فول عالصبح
Dad: اشوفك صاير غبي اليوم!
My name is Dherar
Friend: Go back to school!
Me: There are only three universities in Kuwait that do computer engineering: Kuwait University, AUM and AUK. AUK costs ~600KD per 3 credits. My name is Dherar ALRashoud, not Dherar Scroog McDuck!
Friend: It makes me sad that I know what you mean by Scroog McDuck… I’m getting old…
TO THE STRIPCLUB!!
Me: BRB, going to the strip club
Friend: You mean servers room, right?
Me: Yeah, how did you know?
Friend: I guess…
Me: Damn! You just know me too well…
Winnie the pooh logic
Friend: So you’re scooping bare handed from that huge Nutella jar!? Thats gross!!
Me: Winnie The Pooh scoops honey bare handed straight from the jar. It’s only logical to scoop bare handed straight from a huge jar when given one.
Friend: Winnie The Pooh isn’t real!
Me: YOU’RE NOT REAL!!
*Walking around licking a spoonful of Nutella*
Brother: What are you doing!?
*Staring at him*
Brother: Walk away!!
Me in philosophy mode:
اذا، انا ابرة
OK, I ran out of scenarios… Or at least can’t think anything more at the moment… Hope you enjoyed them :3